Proving Yourself is Pointless: Avidya
"Avidya," the sutras say, "is to mistake the impermanent for the eternal, the impure for the pure, sorrow for happiness, and the not-Self for the true Self."
I often encourage “not knowing” to be the key to living each day fully and freely and in experiencing each moment for the unknown, wild west that it is. I stand behind this kind of purity of existence and also at the same time want to acknowledge the power of “knowing.” Whether that knowing is to know that you don’t know, or to know that you do, requires a devotion to researching yourself, over the blind pursuit of, proving yourself.
Taking the blind fold off is humbling, acknowledging the pursuit has been cloaked in robes of vanity, manipulation, and fear is to acknowledge a wound of self-worth, scabbing over and over again, and the one pulling off the scab, is you.
Every time we participate in comparing, whether it’s in the form of dollars, degrees, or downward facing dogs, we choose to assess ourselves based on an evaluation form of which we have no idea who created. We have no idea what values and ideals it accounted for and whether or not they align with who we actually want to be.
To unfold the blind is to let the light shine in and sometimes this light is so glaringly bright, it reveals an entire house you didn’t even know you were living in.
Vidya is this light. For me, light doesn’t always feel light at first. It can feel overwhelming and illuminate entire rooms I previously did not know existed. This can feel like, shame, guilt, or like not good enough.
We have the choice to shift, resistance from, into, readiness to, Only then, can we fuel our jetpacks from the same great power that was holding us back into the very power propelling us forward. This is the transcendence of avidya to vidya, from dark to light, from impure to pure, from not-self to true self.
Sometimes the most courageous thing we can do is to come to our knees, remove the blindfold, and watch our prefabricated world crumble around us just so that we can feel the truth of the ground beneath us.
***This blog was inspired by my study on the five kleshas, more specifically, avidya, in yoga philosophy. The kleshas are, in short, are our afflictions or the reasons why we suffer. The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali outline five of these kleshas with the first one being Avidya. Avidya can be translated as: ignorance, misperception, misunderstanding, incorrect knowledge, and the opposite of vidya.
As always, I am so honored that you have taken the time to consider my offering. I stand before you with my hands in prayer, humbled and grateful. May this forever moment be upon you with grace, ease, and joy.
Namaste soul fam,
Andrea Dawn
