Are You Addicted to Disliking: Dvesa

In contemplating dvesa or what has been interpreted as: aversions, or, dislikes, we find ourselves on the opposite side of the coin of raga, the attachment to our likes. It seems to me, we spend the majority of our time on one side of the coin or the other, either liking or disliking something or someone, trying to get something we like or running away from something we dislike. This leads us to trying to be somewhere we are not and getting something we don’t have. Our entire lives become governed by a sense of lack and fear. Conversations are opaquely colored with opinions of good and bad, want and don’t want, happy and sad. Moments are tossed carelessly into trash bins all of which add up to days and lifetimes that cannot be recycled, repurposed, or relived. The trashing of our minds is the same as the trashing of our planet.

When I find myself disliking, my partner in crime, is blame. Rabbit holes upon rabbit holes can be filled with disliking other people and their behavior, our government, pollution, someone’s FB post, my own self, religions, genders, races, on and on to infinity. Disliking is just as addictive as liking and neither of them contribute to, or constitute love. In both cases, the mental mind space is being flooded with what is wrong, what is not good enough, and what we don’t have. This is toxic. 

Liking and disliking are not to be confused with awareness. Awareness is the secret sauce, the Goldilocks of life: to exist in a state of awareness without the need to like or dislike and expound precious energy justifying one or the other. The antidote, the real vaccine that we all need to be self-administering is two fold, the vaccine of love and gratitude. For they are what penetrate beyond the surface level, unconscious programming of liking and disliking that wear the ornate gown of ignorance. 

When the frequency of love and gratitude saturate my being, I am liberated from the suffering, fear based, not good enough, want to possess, never enough, ever, and always dissatisfied, feelings of like and dislike. 

The most helpful thing I can do for myself and for all of humanity is to, “be the change.” And the change, the real change, is to move and groove from this humble, wide open space of love, naked, amongst the seeds of openness, willingness, and readiness.  What grows here, is an undeniable strength that is silky soft, a kindness that is unapologetically fierce, and a sincerity that is undeniably sacred. In this fertile ground, I am you and you are me and we are ONE.

*In Yoga philosophy the kleshas are known as the reasons why we suffer. The first of the five kleshas is avidya or ignorance. This is the root of all the other kleshas. If this feels interesting to you, the past three blogs I wrote are on the first three kleshas and you can find them here: Proving Yourself is Pointless: Avidya, Asmita: Hiding Insecurity is Hell, To Like is to Suffer: Raga. Although, it is not necessary to read each one to understand the other. 

It goes without saying, although I’m going to say it anyway because it is so important to me that you know how much I appreciate your time and engagement. This is the ultimate blessing and gift and I receive it as such. May you go forth in your next moment to feel, and know, and be, the love that you are.

Blessed BE you beautiful human,

Andrea Dawn